||`**`|| ♥...SoRRy'S nOt GooD eNougH...♥||`**`||

It's suffocating for one to not be oneself...
wad i'm tryin to say here is that, there's too many posuers in the world.. people who only acted as if everything is nice around them but e fact is every thing is...
argh...

it juz doesn't seem rite.. all things are beginning to take a turn against me.. there are times when i can be very lively for i dunno wad reasons, be very angry for i dunno wad reasons, be sad for i dunno wad reasons.. it's like i'm a totally different person now.. i aint e person i was, e person me buddies used to noe..

wonder if anyone noticed, so far i've been posting me feelings...
i guess i'm hurt that all me feelings took a tumble, it's all over e place

i don wanna be wad i am now, somebody, please help... i don wanna talk, i need someone to comfort me.. i'm not me anymore.. it's like some evil person took away e old me.. help, please

anyways,
ATF was cool.. had fun e whole way, except maybe on the way back to mainland.. completed almost every station.. there's a total of 6 stations, a not-so-high element, tunnel, leap of honor, some sort of Duo climbling on logs after logs, super high elements & flying fox.. me favorite is Flyin Fox, it was like wad, 21 metres high.. super fun, i love height

there were times i got lips from me squad mates for being too noisy & too sarcastic, i tried defendin meself but u shud noe this people, they always say that they're rite & i'm always wrong.. all i've been tryin to do was boost e morale of those on e super challengin & scary stations so that they won't burst into tears up there.. people say e only way to help those on e way to tears was to keep talking, they'll be focusin on wad ur tryin to say & forget bout cryin

so as i was sayin, all i've been tryin to do was to be there for those doin e leap of honor, Hui Yi was on e verge of cryin so i kept sayin, that's e way Hui Yi, keep it up ur goin juz find.. & in the end she managed a wonderful leap to e trapeze..

i mean, is it a bad thing to keep a fren from cryin, cuz i don think so.. these people need comfort, so they noe, there r peole around who'd want them to do their best.. tell me, wad did i do to deserve very hurtful reprimandations from FRIENDS? juz because i was shouting support for others? that so doesnt make sense to me.. yes fine, i'm not perfect, i've flaws but that doesnt mean i don have feelings... i noe how it feels to be alone.. i spend e first 2 months in high school without any frens.. they talked to me on e first day of school & then juz left me by myself when they made other frens...

everything s***s rite now, it's zapping e life out of me
i don have e energy to fight back, like i've said i aint e ol' me anymore

Down Goes Another One